Fiction Made-Up Words
Footfrontier: The One Foot That Guards the Edge of the Duvet
(n.) The single bare foot sent out from under the duvet on a warm night to patrol the cool air at the edge of the bed, while the rest of you stays safely tucked in.
Home Tags
funny
Everything filed under funny.
Articles
Fiction Useless Inventions
The Queue Chooser That Always Finds the Slowest Checkout
A clever little gadget clips onto your shopping trolley and guides you, with total confidence, to the one queue in the shop that is about to stop moving.
Fiction Animal News — Fiction
Owl Insists It Is Not Grumpy, It Simply Cannot Move Its Eyes
A tawny owl in the old oak by the playing field has asked the neighbourhood to stop reading so much into her stare, which she says is just how her face works.
Fiction Useless Inventions
The Jar Lid That Only Opens for the Second Person
A new jam jar lid stays firmly shut for whoever tries first and then twists off with a gentle turn the moment it is handed to someone else, exactly as everyone always suspected.
Fiction Animal News — Fiction
Puffins Deny Colour-Coordinating Their Beaks for the Summer Season
Spokesbirds for a clifftop colony insist the bright orange beaks that appear every spring are entirely natural and have nothing whatsoever to do with fashion.
Fiction Animal News — Fiction
Woodpecker Insists the Knocking Is Just Checking Whether Anyone Is In
For eleven mornings a woodpecker has hammered on the metal chimney cap of number four at ten past six, and he would like it understood that he is being polite, not loud.
Fiction Made-Up Words
Stairhoard: The Pile That Lives at the Bottom of the Stairs
(n.) The small, patient heap at the foot of the staircase, made entirely of things that belong upstairs, which the whole household steps over for six days.
Fiction Useless Inventions
The Photo Frame That Refuses to Pick a Favourite
A beautiful walnut frame that will not choose between the sixty-three nearly identical sunsets on your phone, so it shows you every single one of them, for ever.
Fiction Animal News — Fiction
Raccoon Insists the Dunking Is Quality Control, Not Laundry
Every scrap of bread, three grapes and one entire boiled potato went into the stream before being eaten, and the raccoon responsible would like it recorded as inspection rather than laundry.
Fiction Made-Up Words
Echowish
(n.) The reflex that fires a good wish straight back at the person who offered it, so that a waiter setting down your dinner is warmly told to enjoy his meal too.